gender roles

Gender roles are something that people have connected with society. There are so many strong opinions on what is "normal," what is right and what things should be like, but in this day and age, with all the open minds out there we still try and fit into this certain mold that is instilled in us since birth.
As a lesbian I often battle with the topic of gender roles. I am what the lesbian world calls a femme. I'm a girly girl to the core, I always played with barbies and my favorite color is pink, I love make up, dresses and all things that fall under that girly stereotype so I feel that because of my appearance butchy, studly or masculine women approach me more because they think that's what I would go for. I once went on a date with a stud and she wouldn't let me pay because she said that girls aren't supposed to pay. The first words out of my mouth were "but you're a girl," I ended up letting her pay because she was so pushy, and hey it was a free meal, but I didn't like the feeling of being so conformed. Underneath her baggy jeans and white tee there was a woman with curves. Although I'm feminine, I love to pay for dates, and send flowers and open the door for a girl and a lot of people find that surprising because the automatic reactions I've gotten is that it's not normal, I should be the one who is treated like a girl. I will admit I am attracted to that stud look and a lot of boys I met don't understand why I just wouldn't be with a man but when it comes down to doing things behind closed doors you're doing things with a woman and it's a completley different experience and connection.
I will admit that I have caught myself trying to fit into the social norm and I think it plays into that manly and girly gender molds I thought and still sometimes think I have to fit into. I find myself feeling like i have to be a little more girly around women and label myself as this "wifey" type of girlfriend because I naturally felt like I had to be paired with a more masculine woman to feel more socially accepted. Most of my friends and aquaintances are coupled up in that stud and femme pair some have even use the word, "wusband" to symbolize who was the "husband" in the couple and when one sits back and thinks about it it's rediculous because A, it's a stupid word and B, even in heterosexual couples it is beginning to be a normal thing for the woman to go out and be a successful career woman, while her man holds down the fort and does things like cook dinner and take the kids to school. My dad does a lot of the cooking and decorating in the house and I love that because it shows me that I'm not a failure for being in my twenties and not being able to make a meal for my future life partner. At the same time my dad is a traditional man who would argue with me almost every night because he says it's a woman job to pick up the man's plate and to wash the dishes. He would tell me how I should be for my husband and how being domestic was top priority. Eventually he saw how much of a feminist I have become and he backed off a little but being told how you are supposed to be, act, think dress and live by not only your parents but the media gets to a person and gives people mixed feelings on acting how they really want to be.
In conclusion,gender roles have such a huge affect on society and even the most liberal type of women and men are subconcsiously migrating towards "normal" social behavior. I think that everyone should check out my friend's documentary based on gender roles it's really amazing and gets you thinking. So, please enjoy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_P2uM-qK7Aw